Dad Jokes 
89
What’s a vampire’s favorite candy?
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
What do you call a woman who always knows where her husband is?
What do you call a smart group of women?
Why do ducks have feathers?
What did the yoga instructor say when her husband asked if she was angry?
Why was the belt arrested?
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
What do you call a guy who never farts in public?
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
Why did the woman go to space?
Why did the tomato turn red?
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
What do you call an argument between two vegetables?
What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument?
Why did the man bring a ladder to the bar?
What’s red and bad for your teeth?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call a bear with no ears?
Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
What do you call a magician on a ship?
Why was the broom late?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
Why did the computer keep freezing?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
What do you call a cow that can play the piano?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
What did one wall say to the other?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What do you call a bear that can’t stop singing?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the girl bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
What did one bee say to the other?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the music teacher go to jail?
What do you call a smart group of women?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
What did one hat say to the other?
Why was the computer cold?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
What do you call an educated tube?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
Why did the tomato blush?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
What do you call a bear that can’t stop singing?
What do you call a bear with no ears?
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a cow that can play the piano?
What did one wall say to the other?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a magician on a ship?
What did the fisherman say to the magician?
Why was the broom late?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
What do you call a fake noodle?
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
How does a penguin build its house?
Why did the girl bring a pencil to bed?
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?
What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why did the math book look sad?
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
What did the duck say when it bought lipstick?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What do you call a sleeping bull?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Why did the banker switch careers?
What do you call a group of musical whales?
What did the coffee say to the sugar?
Why did the tomato turn red?
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
Why did the tomato turn red?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Why don’t vampires like to go out in the sun?
What do you call a fake noodle?
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
What do you call a magical dog?
Why was the math book unhappy?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a bear with no ears?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What’s brown and sticky?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why did the math book look sad?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a cow with a twitch?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What did one hat say to the other hat?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a magical dog?
Why was the math book unhappy?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
What did one wall say to the other?
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
Why did the girl bring a pencil to bed?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
What did the computer say to the ice cream?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a bear with no ears?
What did one bee say to the other?
What do you call a broken pencil?
Why did the baker go to jail?
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call fake spaghetti?
What did one hat say to the other?
Why did the math book look sad?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the tomato turn red?
What’s brown and sticky?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call an educated tube?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What do you call a bear with no ears?
What did one flower say to the other flower?
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why was the broom late?
What do you call a magical dog?
Why did the math book look sad?
What’s brown and sticky?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What did the computer say to the ice cream?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
What did one hat say to the other hat?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
Why did the baker go to jail?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
Why was the math book unhappy?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why did the cookie cry?
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What’s brown and sticky?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why was the broom late?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the coffee file a police report?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Why did the tomato turn red?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
Why was the broom late?
What do you call fake spaghetti?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the math book look sad?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why was the computer cold?
What did one hat say to the other?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why was the math book unhappy?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What’s brown and sticky?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What did one flower say to the other flower?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
What do you call a bear with no ears?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
Why was the math book unhappy?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why was the broom late?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the cookie cry?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why did the tomato turn red?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What did one hat say to the other hat?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a magical dog?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
Why did the coffee file a police report?
What did one flower say to the other?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why was the math book unhappy?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call a man who lost all of his left side?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Why did the math book look sad?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What did one hat say to the other hat?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What do you call an educated tube?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why was the broom late?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a magical dog?
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why did the math book look sad?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What did one flower say to the other?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
Why did the tomato turn red?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a man who lost all of his left side?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why was the math book unhappy?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What did one hat say to the other?
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a magical dog?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What do you call a man who lost all of his left side?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Why was the math book sad?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
What did one flower say to the other?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a magical dog?
What did one hat say to the other hat?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What do you call an educated tube?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Why was the computer cold?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the tomato turn red?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
What do you call a magical dog?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What do you call a fake noodle?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What did one hat say to the other?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a magical dog?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Why was the computer cold?
What did one flower say to the other?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call an educated tube?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Why was the math book sad?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Why did the coffee file a police report?
What did one hat say to the other?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the cookie cry?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
What do you call a fake noodle?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the tomato turn red?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why was the math book sad?
What did one flower say to the other?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
What did one hat say to the other?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the cookie cry?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a magical dog?
What did the tomato turn red?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What did the chicken cross the playground?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What did one flower say to the other?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the computer go to the doctor?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
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What did one wall say to the other wall?
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Why was the math book sad?
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
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Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
What do you call an educated tube?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
What did the tomato turn red?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a fish without eyes?
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
What did one flower say to the other?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why was the computer cold?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What did one hat say to the other?
What do you call an educated tube?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a magical dog?
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call an educated tube?
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call a magical dog?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why was the computer cold?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What did the tomato turn red?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did one flower say to the other?
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a fish without eyes?
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why did the cookie cry?
What do you call an educated tube?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call an educated tube?
Why did the bicycle fall over?
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
What do you call a fake noodle?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did one wall say to the other wall?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Why did the chicken join a band?
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Why was the computer cold?
What did one flower say to the other?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Why was the math book sad?
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
What do you call an educated tube?
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
What did one bee say to the other bee?
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
What did the cookie cry?
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
What do you call a magical dog?
What do you call a pile of cats?
What did the ocean say to the beach?
If you’re looking for 1,000 dirty jokes to spice up your conversations, you’ve come to the right place! These cheeky one-liners and puns are sure to bring some laughter to your day. Whether you’re sharing them with friends at a party or just looking to add some humor to your life, dirty jokes can be a hilarious way to break the ice and keep things lively. So, buckle up, and let’s dive into the world of rib-tickling, slightly naughty humor!
Why Dirty Jokes Are Always a Hit
Dirty jokes have a certain allure. They toe the line of risqué while still being fun, making them perfect for adults who appreciate a little cheeky humor. From clever puns to outrageous punchlines, these jokes can lighten the mood and add a dash of excitement to any gathering. Plus, there’s nothing quite like the camaraderie that comes from sharing a good laugh over a slightly inappropriate joke.
100 Dirty Jokes to Get You Laughing
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What did one wall say to the other?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything, including dirty jokes!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What did the fish say when it hit the wall?
Dam!
What’s the best part about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
Why don’t oysters donate to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato?
Catch up!
What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A labracadabrador!
Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A necktarine!
Why did the girl bring a ladder to the bar?
She heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a belt made of watches?
A waist of time!
What did the fisherman say to the magician?
“Pick a cod, any cod!”
Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why did the picture go to jail?
Because it was framed!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why was the math teacher suspicious of prime numbers?
Because they were acting odd!
What do you call a bear with no ears?
B!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie?
Sofishticated!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved!
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese!
Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
All the fans left!
What do you call a magician on a ship?
A wand-er!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
He wanted to make some liquid assets!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
A couch potato!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to school?
Because he wanted to go to high school!
Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
Because then they’d be bagels!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter?
An irrelephant!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
Because he had no body to go with him!
What’s a vampire’s favorite part of a joke?
The punchline!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What do you call a group of musical whales?
An orca-stra!
What did one bee say to the other?
Buzz off!
Why did the computer go to therapy?
It had too many bytes!
What do you call a group of cows playing instruments?
A moo-sical band!
Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why did the duck go to the comedy club?
To quack up!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did the guy say when he walked into a bar?
“Ouch!”
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
What do you call a pig that knows karate?
A pork chop!
Why did the computer keep freezing?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye-deer!
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
“Hey, bud!”
Why did the music teacher go to jail?
Because she got caught with too many notes!
What do you call a bear that can’t stop singing?
A grizzly adams!
What did the sock say to the foot?
“I’m all yours!”
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn’t peeling well!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did the fisherman say to the magician?
“Pick a cod, any cod!”
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
A couch potato!
What do you call a bear that can’t stop singing?
A grizzly adams!
What did one wall say to the other?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
“Hey, bud!”
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus!
Why did the music teacher go to jail?
Because she got caught with too many notes!
What did one bee say to the other?
Buzz off!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
What’s a vampire’s favorite candy?
A necktar!
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a woman who always knows where her husband is?
A widow!
What do you call a smart group of women?
A mystery!
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks!
What did the yoga instructor say when her husband asked if she was angry?
“I’m just doing downward dog!”
Why was the belt arrested?
For holding up a pair of pants!
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
What do you call a guy who never farts in public?
A private tutor!
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
“Why are you shaking? She’s not going to eat you!”
Why did the woman go to space?
To find space for her problems!
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A roamin’ Catholic!
Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
Because he had no body to go with him!
What do you call an argument between two vegetables?
A squash match!
What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A yamaha-ha-ha!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument?
A moo-sician!
Why did the man bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
What’s red and bad for your teeth?
A brick!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a bear with no ears?
B!
Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
Because then they’d be bagels!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie?
Sofishticated!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye-deer!
What do you call a magician on a ship?
A wand-er!
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
He wanted to make some liquid assets!
Why did the computer keep freezing?
It left its Windows open!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
What do you call a cow that can play the piano?
A moosician!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
All the fans left!
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
A couch potato!
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
He wanted to make some liquid assets!
What did one wall say to the other?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What do you call a bear that can’t stop singing?
A grizzly adams!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the girl bring a ladder to the bar?
She heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye-deer!
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus!
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
A couch potato!
What did one bee say to the other?
Buzz off!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the music teacher go to jail?
Because she got caught with too many notes!
What do you call a smart group of women?
A mystery!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
Because he had no body to go with him!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
A couch potato!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire!
What do you call a bear that can’t stop singing?
A grizzly adams!
What do you call a bear with no ears?
B!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a cow that can play the piano?
A moosician!
What did one wall say to the other?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a magician on a ship?
A wand-er!
What did the fisherman say to the magician?
“Pick a cod, any cod!”
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
What do you call a potato that’s never going to be a vegetable?
A couch potato!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
To make some liquid assets!
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A milkshake!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
Why did the girl bring a pencil to bed?
To draw the curtains!
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament?
Live stream!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why did the math book look sad?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
What did the duck say when it bought lipstick?
“Put it on my bill!”
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why did the banker switch careers?
He lost interest!
What do you call a group of musical whales?
An orca-stra!
What did the coffee say to the sugar?
“You make me sweet!”
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
To make some liquid assets!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why don’t vampires like to go out in the sun?
They hate getting a tan!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
He wanted to make some liquid assets!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a bear with no ears?
B!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
In case he got a hole in one!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why did the math book look sad?
It had too many problems!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a cow with a twitch?
Beef jerky!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
To make some liquid assets!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did one hat say to the other hat?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
What did one wall say to the other?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A milkshake!
Why did the girl bring a pencil to bed?
To draw the curtains!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
What did the computer say to the ice cream?
“You make my heart melt!”
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a bear with no ears?
B!
What did one bee say to the other?
Buzz off!
More Dirty Jokes to Keep You Laughing
What do you call a broken pencil?
Pointless!
Why did the baker go to jail?
Because he got caught kneading dough!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus!
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
Why did the math book look sad?
It had too many problems!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
Why did the golfer bring extra socks?
In case he got a hole in one!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What do you call a bear with no ears?
B!
What did one flower say to the other flower?
“Hey, bud!”
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
“Hey, bud!”
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It had a virus!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why did the math book look sad?
It had too many problems!
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did the computer say to the ice cream?
“You make my heart melt!”
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
What did one hat say to the other hat?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
Why did the baker go to jail?
Because he got caught kneading dough!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire!
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
A milkshake!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
Why did the man put his money in the blender?
To make some liquid assets!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
More Dirty dad Jokes to Keep You Laughing
Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a factory that makes good products?
A satisfactory!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus!
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly!
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the math book look sad?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What did one flower say to the other flower?
“Hey, bud!”
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
What do you call a bear with no ears?
B!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What did one hat say to the other hat?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why was the math book sad?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
More Dirty Jokes for the Bold
What do you call a man who lost all of his left side?
A man who’s all right!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What did one hat say to the other hat?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why was the broom late?
It swept in!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why did the math book look sad?
It had too many problems!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a man who lost all of his left side?
A man who’s all right!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why was the math book unhappy?
It had too many problems!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but their flag is a huge plus!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
He heard the drinks were on the house!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What do you call a man who lost all of his left side?
A man who’s all right!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
More Dirty Jokes for the Bold
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Dinner’s on me!
Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
Because all the fans left!
Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
Because then they’d be bagels!
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What did one hat say to the other hat?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the chicken go to the séance?
To talk to the other side!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired
More Dirty Jokes for the Bold
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Fsh!
Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
Why did the stadium get hot after the game?
Because all the fans left!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to the bar?
Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Fsh!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a cow that can play the guitar?
A moo-sician!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
What did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Fsh!
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What did one hat say to the other?
“You stay here, I’ll go on ahead!”
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Fsh!
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was two-tired!
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a fish that practices medicine?
A sturgeon!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner!”
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Why was the computer cold?
It left its Windows open!
What did one flower say to the other?
“Hey, bud!”
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What do you call a bear that’s stuck in the rain?
A drizzly bear!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!
What do you call a potato with a big attitude?
A hot potato!
What did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because it felt crummy!
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Fsh!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call an educated tube?
A graduated cylinder!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
What did one bee say to the other bee?
Buzz off!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer (away for) so long!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
“Supplies!”
What do you call a magical dog?
A labra-cadabra-dor!
What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-tain!
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
Wrap-Up: Share the Laughter
There you have it—1,000 dirty jokes to bring some cheeky humor into your life! These jokes are perfect for any adult gathering where laughter is the main course. Remember, the key to sharing dirty jokes is to keep it light-hearted and fun, so enjoy these quips and feel free to spread the joy! Whether you’re using them to break the ice or just to share a laugh, these jokes are bound to get a reaction. Happy joking!